Public Displays of Affection

(pics via)

Amy Winehouse finally got a chance to thank "Ray-Ray."  We finally got to find out what Daft Punk is doing up in their pyramid (they're playing Simon).  Radiohead was finally mentioned exactly zero times.  And everyone's favorite record of 2007, Herbie Hancock's Something Something Joni Mitchell Something Something finally took home the Golden Wax Cylinder for Best Album of the Year.

This edition of the Grammys chugged along acceptably for a while, serving up some interesting combos - Tina Turner & Beyoncé, Kanye West & Daft Punk, Carrie Underwood & Stomp, Crow T. Robot & the ghost of Frank Sinatra - then frantically pushing them off stage before any actual chemistry could take.  Really awkward moments were kept to a minimum and were mostly predictable:  Cirque du Soleil (to paraphrase Bloom County:  Now, whenever I hear "A Day in the Life" I will think of half-naked, exploding clowns), anything involving a member of the Black Eyed Peas, the second annual attempt at making this into a reality show (A voter-chosen violinist won a non-featured seat in the My Precious Moments Orchestra which was conducted by John Paul Jones and accompanied the Foo Fighters.  How many things can you find wrong in that picture?).  A Time reunion existed only to bookend Rihanna.  Feist, because she's Canadian, was forced to perform "1, 2, 3, 4" backed by brass.  (Having followed a medley of gospel nominees, her usual pallid primary-colored choir probably wouldn't have cut it, either.)  Little Richard and Jerry Lee Lewis were awkwardly staged back-to-back in the shadow of John Fogerty.

For a ceremony where almost 400 awards are given out, there were very few memorable moments involving winners.  Winehouse's nod was nice because, with the performer live via satellite from London, she got to hug her mom in addition to thanking her.  West talked down his exit cue:  After rambling past his allotted time he finally got around to talking about his late mother. "It would be in good taste to stop the music then," he said.  When they did, he looked up and said, "We run this."  Vince Gill had the night's only funny line.  After Ringo Starr presented him with the statuette for Best Country Album, he said, "I just got an award from a Beatle.  Has that happened to you, Kanye?"

Most winners are announced before the telecast, but it's interesting to see who gets to say their thank-yous in prime time.  Prince, for instance, won his Best Male R&B Performance offscreen, but he presented the Best Female R&B Performance category during the broadcast.  Only three awards were given out during the show's opening hour, one of them for "Best Compilation Soundtrack Album."  That one warranted attention either because (a) the winner was Sir George Martin and Beatlesblahblahblah or (b) unlike the average music listener, Hollywood pays for the music it uses.

Quickly:

• OMG remake Rosemary's Baby RIGHT NOW with Cindy Lauper as Minnie Castavet
• Tomorrow, everyone will be scouring the web for a Kid Rock-Keely Smith sex tape
• Cuba Gooding Jr.  In London.  Did they fly him over for that?
• Always great seeing Pat Smear getting an award, but why were there 300 people up there for the Foos' win?
• The pianists totally fucked up the Gershwin.
• Never let Alicia Keys get up from the bench.  Fine singer, fine pianist, awful dancer, awkward walker.  And thank goodness they had that stray keyboard sitting at the end of the runway so she could play that one note.
• Carrie Underwood, Kelly Clarkson, Fantasia, and Daughtry all got noms this year.  Jebus.
• Lost amidst the Winehouseplay, Lily Allen got only a single nom (Alternative), though their shared producer Mark Ronson won Producer of the Year
• That Alternative award went to The White Stripes.  Rock winners:  Springsteen(x3), Foos (x2), Stripes, Slayer.
• LCDSS and Justice lost to The Chemical Brothers
• Barack Obama beat Bill Clinton for Best Spoken Word Album.  Suck it, Bill.
• Bright Eyes won Best Recording Package.  Way to ride ‘em, Winona.
• Best Native American Music Album went to Johnny Whitehorse for Totemic Flute Chants
• Angélique Kidjo won Best Contemporary World Music Album for the so-so Djin Djin.  I might actually finish that post this week.  Anyway, good for her.  We'll consider this belated recognition for earlier work.
• It's awesome to remember the past, but some horses just can't handle the victory lap anymore.  These guys are all legit legends, but: Tony Bennett's clearly not 100% upstairs (at least he didn't mention Target, this time).  Quincy Jones was a lump.  And it's amazing that Jerry Lee Lewis is still alive - he even put out a pretty good record last year! - but the man looks and moves like a pot roast.
• Little Richard, on the other hand, has some amazing fucking genes, or something.
• The Josh Grobin-Andrea Bocelli duet made me uncomfortable.  Everytime Grobin closed his eyes it felt like he was mocking his partner.
• The head of the RIAA actually said, "Fifty years in awarding excellence is an extraordinary milestone."

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Eddie Murphy and Dick Cavett are (or at least, were) friends.  I know, it's odd:  Dick Cavett is not a towering, muscular transvestite.  I've vividly remembered this from back when it originally aired on the NBC; now I can sleep safe knowing YouTube is remembering it for me.

I used to yelp, "Ooo!  Dick Cavett!" whenever someone brushed against my ass.

This guy has bunches of comedian-oriented clips from the old show, lots of stuff that's just funnier after one in the morning.  Emo Phillips!  ("I used to pray every night for a new bicycle, then I realized the Lord doesn't work that way.  So I just stole one and asked him to forgive me.")  Brother Theodore!  ("You make Bella Abzug look like an airline hostess!")  Lotsa Rickles.  Incidentally, I'll be late with that thing what I was supposed to have finished.

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A couple totally unrelated hardly imminent concert upcomings for calendar-marking purposes:

* Punch Brothers (myspace) - who used to be The Tension's Mountain Boys, who also doubled as The How to Grow a Band, who are the Chris Thile non-Nickel Creek project mentioned here previously - are finally set to release Thile's forty-minute prog-bluegrass suite on Nonesuch at the end of the month.  They're on tour playing that, plus other stuff, probably;  they'll be at the Allen Room at Lincoln Center on February 20th.  Tickets are here, and are too expensive.

*Evangelista is Carla Bozulich, whose previous solo record was called Evangelista, who is late of Scarnella and The Geraldine Fibbers and Ethyl Meatplow.  The first Evangelista album, Hello, Voyager, comes out March 11th on Constellation Records; like the last Bozulich solo album, Evangelista, it's hit or miss, but hits hard when it connects.  It too ends with an extended, scorching sermon; great music to hate yourself by.  Upcoming tour dates aren't on Bozulich's site or her myspace, but the band's myspace has a ToddP show at Death by Audio on 4/18 and a Cake Shop appearance on 4/19.

*Thank goodness for the Cake Shop gig, because April 18th belongs to Cloud Cult (myspace).  Last time I saw them was last April, the first night of a two-night Mercury Lounge stand.  I just love these guys, and though their 2007 record didn't work for me (a bit slight and self-helpy), that show was exactly what I needed.  I'd just come from a Jandek performance that had lasted almost three hours; most acts shouldn't play for three hours, Jandek mostest of them all.  After surviving dark twelve minute improvs around material like...

Starve my body
Starve my mind
(jam)
I walk around the grocery store
I walk around the book store
(jam)
All these boxes
All these pages
Are not for me

...hearing someone sing "Someone sing us a song that makes us feel like the dead are breathing birthday balloons and they blow and they blow" was like receiving a warm hempy hug.  They sounded great, the violin is back in the mix, the paintings were lovely.

I had tix but missed the Minnesotans' last Bowery show, and the band has had to cancel a bunch of recent dates due to some sort of protracted illness.  Good to see they'll be up and out again (though they're apparently short a drummer).  A new record is due out on April 8th.  Bowery tix are here, more dates (including SXSW) on their myspace.  Attendance is mandatory.

*ALSO:  I have reason to believe that, for some weird reason, Emmy the Great is going to be on this bill.  Nothing on the Bowery Presents page or at Ticketmaster, though, and I wouldn't want to accidentally wind up seeing Duffy <shudder> for no good cause. Nehvermind.

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Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh.

tags: grammys  

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